The NU Lady Bulldogs started the college basketball season the same way they did last year: without Cielo Pagdulagan on the floor.
Their automatic bucket, the score-at-will, purest of the pure hooper who stamped her arrival in the UAAP with the most obvious Rookie of the Year and Finals MVP recognition.
Cielo was on the bench. Or to be more accurate, she was standing by the far end of the bench, her movements alternating between stretching and almost bouncing, her body trying to contain the outburst of energy. Cielo waited for this moment for so long, just to be with her teammates, her sisters, her people. She didn’t want to sit any longer. A year away from the game, she had enough sitting.
After helping NU win back the championship in Season 87, Cielo got the bad news: she got diagnosed with a rare illness, which meant she needed special medical attention, which meant she can’t do any form of physical activity, which meant she can’t play basketball.
“Sobrang masakit para sa’kin kasi hindi ko masasamahan ‘yung mga teammates ko na lumaban sa court,” Cielo told me after her first game back.
(It really hurt because I won’t be able to join my teammates battle on the court.)
The rare condition sent Cielo from hoisting her Finals MVP trophy to being holed up in her room alone. Following doctors’ orders, she had to be seated and relaxed. She wasn’t allowed to walk for more than three minutes. Even going up and down the stairs became demanding. From all the freestyling, scoring-at-will highlights, Cielo went to just watching the games live on a screen and relying on postgame stories from her teammates.
“Sobrang na-down ako and dumating sa point na sobrang na-stress ako and nagkaroon ako ng anxiety,” said Cielo.
“Hirap na hirap ako maka-recover that time. Ang daming tumatakbo sa isip ko. Like, paano na ako? Baka hindi na ako makalaro. Baka katapusan na ng basketball career ko.”
(“I was really down and it got to a point where I was really stressed and I had anxiety. It was difficult for me to recover at that time. A lot of things ran through my head: what’s going to happen to me? What if I can’t play again? What if this is the end of my basketball career?”)
Left to her thoughts and without hoops to save her, Cielo took to writing in her journal, pouring feelings, prayers, hopes, frustrations, questions, messages that no one will get to read. She wrote to God; went to mass. She wrote to family.
“Ako kasi ‘yung magsu-support sa family ko and dahil sa basketball kaya ko sila masu-support. Noong time na ‘yun, naisip ko, paano na ‘yung mga kapatid ko? Paano na ‘yung mama ko?”
(“I’m the one who’ll support my family by playing basketball. At that time, I thought, what will happen to my siblings? What will happen to my mama?”)
Check out Cielo’s stats in the highest of the highest stakes Game 3 of the Season 87 Finals: 21 points, nine rebounds, three assists, and three steals. Remember in The Bear when Chef Carmy got locked inside the refrigerator, contributed nothing, and catastrophically blew it on the biggest opening night of The Bear? Cielo did the exact opposite of that. Oh, she cooked cooked. She was there on the court like she had been there before. She left as if she’ll be doing it year after year after year.
“Ang hirap na hindi ako makalaro eh. Hindi ko talaga matanggap,” she said.
(“It was hard not being able to play. I couldn’t accept it.”)
The NU Lady Bulldogs have been known for doing things together. The difficult situation with Cielo was treated no differently. Her teammates would rush back to her room to tell her about what happened in practice. They would listen to her when she needed to vent. The Lady Bulldogs’ team manager, Rona, also took it upon herself to be Cielo’s go-to companion at doctor check-ups. No missed appointments; medication always stocked at her bedside. Cielo never had to go through it alone.
“Kahit sa school, kapag may stairs, binubuhat ako ng teammates ko para hindi ako mapagod,” she said.
(“In school, my teammates carried me when I had to go up and down the stairs so I won’t get tired.”)
She was cleared for basketball activities in April, merely months away from the UAAP opening, which meant she had to regain her form, which meant she had to join practices again with her teammates, which meant there’s hope for her basketball career. Second chances don’t come often. Cielo wasn’t about to take it sitting down.
She entered the game at the 7-minute mark, after spending the first three minutes of the game jittery but laser-focused on the court, taking her breathing seriously, trying her best to contain the bottled up excitement of getting to do something she does best.
“Sobrang happy ako kasi ang tagal ko inantay na makalaro ulit,” she said.
(“I’m so happy because I waited for so long to play again.”)
The way Cielo played in her first UAAP game after a year, it felt like déjà vu, as if she’s out to get the Rookie of the Year trophy all over again. Her jumper looked as smooth as ever, her spin to the basket carried that same lethal dose. She let out a loud scream when the buzzer sounded. Her teammates rushed to her to celebrate their first win – together, in a long while.
“Lagi ko iniisip na, ‘everything happens for a reason.’ Para sa akin, hindi ako bibigyan ni Lord ng chance na makalaro ulit para pabayaan niya ako. Grateful ako na nakakalaro na ako,” Cielo said.
(“I always thought to myself, ‘Everything happens for a reason.’ I believe the Lord didn’t give me a second chance to get back on the court for nothing. I’m grateful for being able to play again.”)
I asked her, now that she has less downtime and more hoops – and health – to take care of, what type of words would her journal hold moving forward?
“Gusto ko lang magpasalamat. ‘Yun lang.”
(“I’m just grateful. That’s it.”)
I checked the stat sheet after the game, still shaken by the fact that she wasn’t even allowed to walk for three minutes straight a year ago. She scored 17 points and played 23 minutes off the bench. Spread the news around to everyone concerned: Cielo is fit to get buckets.
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[Photo by Ino Muñoz; Artwork by Melvin Rodas]
